Why Do We Tremble or Shake When Upset? Exploring the Physiology of Emotional Shaking
- Anna Donaldson
- Oct 18, 2023
- 5 min read
Updated: 6 days ago
Have you ever felt your hands tremble when you're deeply upset? Maybe your breath gets shaky, or your whole body starts to quiver. I’ve experienced this too, and it can be confusing and even frightening. But here’s the truth: shaking when upset is a normal, physical response to emotional stress.
In this post, I’ll explain why your body reacts this way, what it means, and how you can calm yourself when it happens. You’ll learn how to work with your body—not against it—to feel more grounded and in control.

The Body’s Response to Being Upset
When you’re upset, your body doesn’t just feel emotions—it reacts physically. You might notice trembling hands, a shaky breath, or an urge to move. These reactions are part of your body’s built-in stress response system.
I’ve felt this many times—especially during arguments, emotional breakdowns, or moments of intense anxiety. My body starts to shake, and I used to think something was wrong with me. But now I understand it’s just my nervous system doing its job.
Shaking can show up in different ways:
Your hands tremble uncontrollably.
Your breath becomes short and shaky.
You feel shivers down your spine.
Your legs feel weak or jittery.
You want to pace, stretch, or shake it off.
These symptoms might feel alarming, but they’re actually signs that your body is trying to release tension.
The Fight or Flight System Explained
To understand why you shake when upset, you need to know about the fight or flight response. This is your body’s automatic reaction to stress or danger. It’s designed to help you survive.
When you’re emotionally upset, your brain sends signals to release stress hormones like adrenaline and cortisol. These hormones prepare your body to either fight or flee. Even if there’s no physical threat, your body still reacts as if there is.
What Happens Inside Your Body
Here’s what those stress hormones do:
Muscle Tension: Your muscles tighten to prepare for action.
Heart Rate Increases: Your heart pumps faster to deliver energy.
Alertness Heightens: Your senses sharpen to detect danger.
This surge of energy needs somewhere to go. If you don’t fight or flee, your body finds another way to release it—through shaking. I’ve noticed that after a stressful event, my body often trembles. It’s like my system is trying to reset itself. That’s not weakness—it’s biology.
Shaking Is Your Body’s Way of Releasing Tension
Once the emotional storm starts to pass, your body needs to let go of the built-up tension. That’s where shaking comes in. It’s a natural, involuntary way to discharge excess energy.
Think of it like a pressure valve. Your body shakes to release stress and return to balance. I’ve learned to see it as a sign that my body is healing—not breaking down.
Trying to suppress shaking can make things worse. I used to clench my fists and hold my breath, hoping it would stop. But that only increased the tension. Now, I let my body do what it needs. I breathe deeply, move gently, and remind myself that this is temporary. The more I accept it, the faster it fades.
What to Do When You Start Shaking
If you’re shaking because you’re upset, don’t panic. There are simple, effective ways to calm your body and mind. These steps have helped me—and it's likely they can help you too.
1. Move Your Body - Your body wants to release energy, so let it move. I go for a walk, stretch my arms, or even dance around my room. Movement helps discharge stress and reduce shaking.
Try these:
• Brisk walking
• Gentle stretching
• Shaking out your hands
• Dancing to music
• Wiggling your toes
Even small movements can make a big difference.
2. Practice Deep Breathing - Breathing deeply helps calm your nervous system. I use a simple method: inhale for four seconds, hold for four, exhale for four. Repeat until you feel more grounded. Deep breathing increases oxygen flow and slows your heart rate. It’s one of the fastest ways to reduce physical symptoms of stress.
3. Use Mindfulness or Meditation - Mindfulness helps you stay present and observe your body without judgment. I sit quietly, notice my breath, and let my thoughts come and go. Meditation teaches your brain to respond calmly to stress.
You don’t need to be perfect. Just take a few minutes to pause and breathe.
4. Be Kind to Yourself - Shaking doesn’t mean you’re weak or broken. It means your body is responding to emotional overload. I remind myself that it’s okay to feel this way.
Speak gently to yourself:
• “I’m safe right now.”
• “My body is releasing stress.”
• “This will pass soon.”
Self-compassion helps you heal faster than criticism ever could.
5. Reach Out for Support - If shaking becomes frequent or intense, talk to someone. I’ve spoken with therapists who helped me understand my reactions and taught me coping strategies.
You don’t have to go through this alone. Support is available, and it can make a huge difference.
How Long Does Shaking Last?
Shaking from emotional upset usually doesn’t last long. It’s a temporary response that fades as your stress hormones settle. For me, it often lasts a few minutes—sometimes longer if the stress is intense.
The key is to let it happen without fear. The more you resist, the longer it may linger. The more you accept, the faster it resolves.
If shaking continues for hours or interferes with daily life, seek medical advice. It could be a sign of deeper anxiety or another condition.
Final Thoughts: Shaking Is a Sign of Healing
Shaking when upset isn’t something to fear—it’s something to understand. Your body is doing its best to cope with emotional stress. It’s releasing tension, restoring balance, and helping you recover.
I’ve learned to trust my body’s signals. When I shake, I know it’s time to slow down, breathe, and care for myself. You can do the same.
Here’s what I want you to remember:
Shaking is a normal response to being upset.
It’s your body’s way of releasing stress and tension.
You can manage it with movement, breathing, and self-compassion.
Support is available if you need extra help.
So the next time you feel yourself trembling, don’t panic. Take a deep breath. Let your body do what it needs. You’re not broken—you’re healing.
Key Takeaways
Shaking is a Natural Stress Response - Your body releases tension through trembling after emotional overload.
Fight-or-Flight Triggers Physical Changes - Upset emotions activate stress hormones that cause muscle tension and alertness.
Movement and Breathing Help You Regain Control - Gentle exercise and deep breathing calm your nervous system quickly.
Self-Compassion and Support Are Essential - Be kind to yourself and seek help if symptoms persist.
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